Sorry for the long delay between posts. For the summer, I will probably only blog every week or two. In the fall, I’ll get back to aiming at twice a week.

I preached this last Sunday about “How to have a great summer”. One issue that comes up again and again for many in the summer is that they want a season to recharge. But- I am reminded of a Bill Cosby comedy sketch where he pointed out that people talk all day Friday about how they need the weekend to recharge, and then come back Monday morning exhausted and bleary-eyed. In the same way, I feel so often that people come back from vacations and holidays more worn out than when they started.

One key thing to find out about yourself is what recharges you. It’s pretty crucial to understand that each person is different in this way. We not only have different preferences for being recharged, we really have different definitions of what being “recharged” means.

Le Que and I have a weekly meeting where we look at our schedule for the next week, next three months, and next year. It’s super helpful, and super complicated. There are so many different balances. How much travel, how much staying home? How much attention to the marriage, how much attention to our kids, how much to the church, how much to at-large ministry? When will we have down time? When will do fun things. It’s important for us both to acknowledge that we need different kinds of rhythms.

All that said, we also need to accept the imperfection of life. Sometimes, you’re just going to be really tired, or bored, or frustrated. Acknowledging this can help.

How do you manage your pace of life?

I will admit to being slower than Tigers fans to realize the power of forgiveness to overcome a blown call. I am fairly moved by Gayle Haggard’s forgiveness of her husband, and his haunted humility as he moves forward as a man under grace. Who can forget- and we probably shouldn’t- the grace of the Amish community towards the gunman?

In each case, I find myself moved- not just a little bit, but deeply. As if there is an undercurrent in our humanity that recognizes the incredible power of forgiveness. What if forgiveness reigned on earth? Between spouses, races, nations, political parties, siblings, churches, friends? Can we imagine a greater paradise?

I have often thought that the most important prayer for emotional and relational health is “forgive us our sins as we forgive those who sin against us.” If we could truly pray that with our deepest heart everyday, we would need less therapy, less divorces, less weapons, and less antidepressants. Is it any wonder that the act at the center of the entire biblical drama is the death and resurrection of Christ for the forgiveness of sins?

Here’s the necessary connection between forgiveness and leadership: none. And that is scary.

You can be a really effective leader even if you never forgive anyone, or receive forgiveness yourself. In fact, if you act like you’ve got everything together, you can pressure people into trying to conform themselves to your glittering image. I’ll be honest- I’ve done it. But you will lead people into anxiety and despair. (Though, by grace, God may do something good in their lives anyways.)

But when you can be, as Nouwen said, a wounded healer, a forgiven leader, a broken lover, you will lead people to the water they can’t live without. When you can offer both humility and mercy to those who would follow you, you are giving them a gift that sustains life. I remember early in my 20s, I was leading a ministry and royally screwed up. Badly. And I remember going to my pastor, Hap, and expecting to be lambasted and fired. And he sort of smiled at me, forgave me, and told me not to do it again. That did something really powerful to me.

Have you experienced the power of a forgiving leader? Have you experienced the pain of the opposite?